Wonder Nuts

There is a road in Louisa County, Virginia, called Wonder Nut Farms Rd. Details are murky, but it does seem like there was, at some point, a farm nearby called Wonder Nut Farms. There may or may not now be a transportation company by the same name near that location.

Wondernut Farm is also the name of a working dairy and meat farm in a remote section of California. 

The term “wonder nut” has been used to promote a toxic, dangerous nut marketed as a weight-loss option. That nut, Aleurites moluccanus or candlenut, has been banned in at least four countries. Walnuts and kola nuts (of course) have also been dubbed wonder nuts for their own reasons. 

Why share this? 

None of us knows how we’ll be remembered when it’s our time to leave this realm for the next. If you’d like, you can write epics, build empires, lead men, establish a bloodline or alleviate others’ suffering. 

For my part, I’ll be content to have authored the top Google hit when someone searches for “wonder nut.”

Shifting Sand

Rob Sand, Democratic candidate for governor of Iowa and proud owner of Buscemi Eyes, has been running a campaign that is impressively adapted to the modern digital world. Comb through his Instagram account and you’ll see his team adopting common trends like interviews with local influencers and burrito reviews. But there’s one video in particular that is clever in a number of ways – and probably not all of them intentional. On September 28th he, or more likely his campaign, posted this video deconstructing his:30 ad. 

First, let’s look at the intentional cleverness. One of the least secretive secrets of campaign ads is that the “real people” in them are often tied to the campaign in some way. Volunteers, family members, friends, etc. are all trotted out to mug for the camera, to look worried or excited, content or put-upon, to stare worriedly at bills or illuminate “open” signs on their small businesses. Sand’s original 30-second ad has groups and individuals posing in different, presumably Iowan locations. But while breaking down his own ad on Instagram, Sand stops and tells you the identity of each of the “real people” and how he’s connected to them. It’s a clever double-move. First, he’s acknowledging the insincerity of most political ads by telling you these aren’t just random Iowans or even a collection of his supporters. They’re people who he called on for a favor. But then (!) he restores that sincerity by explaining a real personal connection to each of them. It’s a neat trick. It compliments the viewer, tacitly saying, “I know you don’t fall for this crap,” but then offers a new thing for them to fall for. 

But if you watch the video one or two more times, something even deeper reveals itself. It’s the kind of thing that causes one eyelid to droop and makes you suddenly need a nap. Think for just a minute about the type of political ad he’s annotating. You’ve seen a thousand of them – they depict life around the state or district while the candidate interrupts the scenes and speaks directly to you about their beliefs. The candidate usually looks right down the barrel of the lens, breaking the fourth wall, effectively stepping outside of the tableau the ad creates. But here we have Sand stepping outside of THAT format to try and make a connection and deliver additional messages. The Sand in the baseball hat interrupts the visuals of the 30-second ad to look at the camera and tell you something. Maybe bond with you. But the Sand from Instagram interrupts that other Sand to try and bond more deeply. 

Post-modern campaigning? Clever social media strategy? Natural evolution? Whatever it is, it’s smart and thinking about it makes me tired.

Story Time

Gather around, kids. Criss-cross applesauce or whatever. No! Hey! No. We don’t hit. Hands to ourselves. We use our words, right? Right.

And that’s actually what our story is about today, boys and girls. It’s about some people who did know how to use their words. They knew how to use them very well. But then one day… well, you’ll just have to see.

Once upon a time, a long time ago, there was a magical land. In some ways, this land wasn’t that different from ours, but in other ways, it was very different. You see, the people of this land hadn’t heard of Twitter, or X, or TikTok, or anything like that yet. And what we call “news” meant something much different. Their news was more about information. And even people who disagreed usually watched the same news shows on TV. Hmm? TV? Oh, it was like a big box of YouTube, but it only had four or five creators. And the people of this land – Max, get that thing out of your mouth! – the people of this land valued a certain type of conversation. They liked it when things were smart, relatable and maybe even a little clever. 

In this kingdom there were writers. They were conservative political writers, yes, but they were creative, too. What’s that? Well, we have to use our imaginations to picture a time like that, right friends? Some were funny like Carlson and Labash. Others were thoughtful and deep thinkers like Will or Kristol or Brooks. Now, some of these writers were friends with each other, and some were not. Some of them worked together while others did not. But they all worked hard at their jobs. They wrote about America and politics and society and other countries and almost all of it was worth reading. Even if you didn’t agree with them. 

But then something happened. Their kingdom got a new king who didn’t like anyone who was better with words than he was. And unless these good writers told the king that he was the best, the king would insult them and tell people not to read them. Do you remember last week when we had that talk about how we treat each other on the playground? Yes. It WAS like that. 

So the writers all went on different adventures. Some decided to tell the king what he wanted to hear. Some started to do that and then changed their minds. Other writers went off to say mean things about the king and some just seemed to stop trying. You know boys and girls, all of their crazy adventures are a little like a movie you’ll watch when you’re older by Monty Python, but don’t worry about that now. 

But even though our story time is just about done for today, this story doesn’t have an ending just yet. You see, the king’s time is running out and the writers have all gotten older. When that king is gone and a new one has taken his place, will the writers go back to what they used to do? Will people even care? We’ll have to see, boys and – DAMMIT MAX THAT IS NOT FOOD GET IT OUT OF YOUR MOUTH – boys and girls. Ok, everyone to their naptime spot.

Absurd(ist) Press Release

It seems like every minute of every day we’re confronted with a sentence we never thought we’d read. But even in a world of non sequiturs, this press release from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services stands out. It feels like it was written by Kafka and edited by Pynchon.

A few selections:

  • “HHS agencies have launched more than 20 initiatives to expand the use of technologies including human organoids, tissue models, artificial intelligence, and computational modeling while reducing reliance on animal models.”
  • “NIH has also closed its last intramural beagle laboratory and allows grant funding to be used to retire or rehome research animals.”
  • “The agency has issued multiple guidances designed to reduce animal studies in drug development, including changes expected to spare hundreds of non-human primates and more than one million horseshoe crabs annually.”

The Meaning of Sacrifice

Sacrifice transitive verb

  1. To not do what you’d prefer to do. To do something you’d rather not.
  1. To give to. To give up for. To give up.
  1. To do less than you’re able. To slow down for, or take less than you want. To leave for the other, defer to. To hunger. To stop.
  1. To endure absence. To abide. To miss. To continue.
  1. To suffer pain or fear on behalf of another or on behalf of an ideal.
  1. To trust that there is value in lessening yourself. To hope.

What Fresh Hell is This?

Are people covering single songs in the hopes of confused Spotify listeners playing them instead of the original? All for what – a nanometer of a penny? 

Though the date of 2019 on the song below, makes me wonder if it’s an honest attempt to put a song on Spotify by a band that is a bit naive. Whether malice or mistake, the attorneys of Faces, Rod Stewart, Ron Wood and all their subsidiary entities are clearly asleep at the switch. So feel free to start posting your shower performances of Stay With Me.

From Spotify:

A Usage Dictionary for the 2026 Election Cycle – Part 2

More than usual, this cycle seems to have both major parties working to reverse-justify changes in positions. In a time when populism reigns and parties are whatever their basest base says they are today, I guess it shouldn’t be surprising. What also shouldn’t be surprising is that they’re using certain key phrases to do it. (NOTE: this may actually be surprising to Axios which awoke one morning to realize politics might be about language. Careful out on that ledge.)

So our second installment of the 2026 election cycle usage dictionary includes a phrase from each side that attempts to reframe the past to avoid contradiction.

Woke 1 [was crazy]

Democratic usage: Popularized by NYC Councilman Chi Osse and launched into the collective political consciousness by Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. Its goal is excusing or explaining words and actions used by left-leaning figures as far back as 6 years ago. The use of “1,” rather than “version 1” or even “v1” hints that this phrase is born of, and is targeted at a younger, possibly more liberally-inclined audience. Stay tuned to see if it catches on enough to be said to other demos and how they receive it. 

“My understanding is that — is that Francesca Hong has made clear her present stances to her electorate…Right, she’s moved away from it. And I have a local city councilman that –Woke one was crazy.” ABC “This Week” 8/9/26, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez

Whole-of-Government

Republican usage: A term used to thread the needle when it comes to employing a large government to address problems. It endorses using or building all of the government resources necessary, while hoping to avoid reminding the audience that the party using this term once recoiled from and fought against the very ideas this phrase now justifies.

“Civil Rights in the Second Trump Administration: A Whole-of-Government Shift” – Federalist Society Event

“Trump Administration Launches Whole-of-Government Effort to Fight Welfare Fraud” – National Review, 3/27/26 

“ By marshaling a whole-of-government approach, our task force has already exposed and brought to justice countless fraudsters who’ve exploited the kindness of American taxpayers.” Washington Post, JD Vance, “The president is fighting a fraud crisis. Now Congress can help.”

From the Roads Not Chosen File: Reno 911 Writer

Dangle: “Did you hear they closed that yogurt place up off Main Ave?”

Junior: “Which one, ‘Gurt Slingers’?”

Dangle: “Yeah, the one that used to be ‘Yo Yo MaGurt’?”

Junior: “Oh no, really? I loved that place. Makes sense, I guess, though.”

Dangle: “Definitely. Soooo many fights at that place.”

Junior: “Right. Like, a LOT of fights. To be honest, I think something shady might’ve been going on there?”

Dangle: “Oh yeah?”

Junior: “Yeah. You know, everytime I’d order, that guy behind the counter would ask if I wanted ‘fruit on the bottom’ and then he’d wink, ya know? Like a suspicious wink. Like… Watch… he’d wink like that, you see?”

Dangle: “Hmm. Well, I can’t see. You’re wearing sunglasses, remember?”

Junior: “Right. Right.”

Small Wins

Often, while perpetually treading water in the flood of curated content, we need a toehold. Something meaningful or substantive to balance the firehose of videos, images, headlines, etc. that leave us feeling like we’re on our second Four Loko.

But, to torture the metaphor, this flood, like all the ones before it, has reshaped the landscape. It feels harder now to find and digest something meaningful. We don’t have the space to both consume something AND consider it, evaluate it, interpret it. Time is shorter. Neglecting the content feels like opting out of society. On and on.

But The Poorer Quarters understands and is here to help. Below are a few small doses of substance that can hopefully serve as a palate cleanser when things feel too Loko. 

In no particular order:

A four-page short story written in the 70s, but it still feels urgent. Explores themes of comfort, choice and our duty to others.

Just one page is needed to destroy your perception of reality and your place in it.  

Three sentences. And a story I think about every single day. 

Already referenced here in TPQ. But it’s always worth a read even if only to remind yourself of the seventh and eighth lines in the first stanza. 

  • If– by Rudyard Kipling – Poem, Guidance

It’s funny how the advice you’re supposed to give to the next generation winds up being the advice you, yourself also need.